10 Years - 10 Best Helios Images - (#10) Countdown

It was possibly one of the worst photo shoots I’ve ever had. But as results go, this image easily made it into the top 10 best as number 10. 

I’ve always felt that a model, a really really great model has to tow the line somewhere between arrogance and confidence. I for one, believe that at times it can be difficult to tell the difference. However, this wasn’t one of those times. There was no line here. That same arrogance/confidence balance emboldens me to do what I need to do as a visual artist to move to a higher creative potential. You see when we approach a project, we need to enter into it without doubt. We do not care at all for the shy, the timid, the weak, the doubtful or the unsure. When we hesitate the shoot falters and we never come to full a creative realization and will forever linger in what could have been. That’s a waste of time and resources; ultimately it’s a waste of money. But what happens when a model thinks herself far better? It’s doesn’t make for a good time that’s for sure.

It only took about five minutes into this shoot before I wanted to leave. I was constantly reminded how she was “doing me a favor” for some reason. I was actually told that I should feel privileged to be there and how no one has ever had an opportunity to be in her personal lair and I should feel “special.” It was kinda sickening. 

In hindsight, I largely blame myself. She can only be responsible for herself and not my own actions, attitudes or opinions. I mean who really cares what I think right? I could have simply packed up and left. Here is how I would do it different. First and foremost, I would not take on the project. It's that simple. I didn’t know her. I had not checked references or spoken with anyone else she had worked with. I also realized that people have different ways of expressing themselves when they’re nervous or uncomfortable. Some of them brag, others develop very negative attitudes, some get quiet and shy, too many others talk too much or do not talk at all. Since this shoot, we’ve had models get upset stomachs while others do the absolute worst thing and cancel before the shoot even commences. 

To this day I have never had a photo shoot so surreal. It was just bizarre. I've never had a model like this one in terms of personality. It just doesn't happen to me and has yet to happen again. A couple of hours after this photo shoot, a friend asked me "how did the shoot go?" I hesitated and said that I honestly didn't know. I was confused by the entire episode. I also know now that no matter how talented two people are, sometimes the collaboration was not meant to be. You just feel like you should hit reset and go back and have a do over. We may make great friends but we should probably never ever work together. Some relationships are just that way. At the time the atmosphere of it all was simply not conducive to a positive collaborative experience. 

After it’s all said and done and after a couple of years have passed and I’ve had time to reflect on the shoot, I’ve deemed it as a positive experience. I got a few fantastic images out of it. I will not take away from her the fact that she is a talented model. The experience also drastically changed who we work with from that point on. It changed the when, the where and what assignments we take. It caused us to limit our barter projects to almost nothing or under extremely special circumstances. The experience forced me to re-write my model release to the betterment of largely the model but also me, the photographer. I now include a full discussion before and after the shoot about what can be expected from me and what is expected from the subject before during and after the shoot. I learned so much from this shoot despite my having photographed people for several years and never having a situation as unusual as this one.

This really isn't a reflection at all on her ability but a review of what we feel our strongest and most memorable images are over the last several years. Yet, it's difficult to be objective about any image you've taken as a photographer. It's more about results. It's a cost-benefit analysis of all the things it takes to get there and most non-photographers can't appreciate the effort without having the background or having experienced it themselves. 

Since she has never used a single image from the entire shoot, I can only conclude that she felt like crap about the shoot too despite the fact that many of the images I had taken could arguably be among the very best of her known portfolio. That’s alright with me. But I know a great picture when I see one. I know a great model when I work with one. Therefore, nothing will stop me from giving her the credit she’s due. She is a beautiful and talented model and for that I thank her for the opportunity and sincerely wish her all the best.