"I Don't Want To Look Chubby"

I’ve amassed a litany of platitudes from people over the years; platitudes designed to help them cope with their never ending self-loathing and other perceived inadequacies. While many are simply par for the proverbial course, others grate on my last nerve like the dragging of fingernails down the chalkboards of the past. The complaints began even before the shoot day arrives.

“What about the weather? I’m so worried about the weather. What will we do if it rains, blah, blah, blah?” Guess what? Weather happens. There isn’t anything I can do to control the weather. Rain chants and dances, sun worship and the deity of light don’t do my personal bidding. If you’re a smart cookie then you have some contingencies for that eventuality. First and foremost, we live in the Pacific NW. Rain is inevitable. Whether it be right now or later, it’s just something you have to get over. If you’re waiting on the perfect weather for every single photo shoot you intend to have, then you will not get much done. Our advice is to stop deflecting your inadequacies or your lack of confidence to things beyond your control. You probably just don’t want to be outside or get your hair a little damp. But if you’re a real model then you’ve done your homework. Have you ever seen running makeup, or flattened hair in this photographers port because it rained? Likely not. Are you worried about looking bad? Have you seen a picture from said photographer where the model looked “bad?” If not, get on with the shoot. If it rains, it rains.

If there are indoor portions of the photo shoot planned then focus on those. At worst, you get to spend more time on perfecting poses, enhancing and trying out different angles and quite often getting more out of the shoot than you originally planned. If there is an impending deluge in the forecast then one can simply shoot all indoors and save the outdoor segment for a later date if possible. But don’t complain to me about weather for a shoot that is weeks away. Not even a meteorologist can forecast that far out so why are you nagging to me about it? Some people I just don’t get.

Don’t get it twisted. I’ve had shoots rained out before when and only when the entirety of the shoot was outdoors and it was nothing short of a downpour. A sprinkle here and a sprinkle there never stopped a dedicated model or a committed photographer from getting it done. Situations vary, but if it must be done, there is a good chance that it can be with some adjustments. I’ve had models shoot in the rain and the pics were epic. Of course, one was swimwear so that worked to our advantage. The other was fashion and the rain wasn't heavy. It was a very recent shoot no more than two weeks ago and the dreary gray skies actually enhanced the general atmospherics I could never have gotten without the dismal looking sky. A bleak sky meant drama and contrast I would never have dreamed of. The images turned out gorgeous. But the model was absolutely incredible. She knew rain was likely but forged on. She refused to cancel. That’s dedication. In short, that’s a true professional model that understands what it takes.

The second biggest gripe is the “chubby” factor. “I don't want to look chubby” she says. Chubby?!!! Chubby”!!!! If you don’t want to be chubby then go to a gym. Wear a girdle. Go on a diet. Does anyone look any more “chubby” (as this prospect says) than they are in pictures I have personally ever taken? Or more to the point, do you consider yourself “Chubby?” Ahhhh! Now we get to the meat of the problem. You feel that YOU are chubby and are worrying and stressing about how you will look on your shoot that has been over a year in the making. But you’re an experienced model and you’re stressing about looking chubby and then telling the photographer and stylist about it? That’s just wrong. What were you doing during that time all those months ago before meeting this person? Apparently it wasn't worrying about being “chubby.” Are you not prepared for a photo shoot you have been pleading for and begging for all that time?

Now before any of you get your panties in a bunch, I am not bullying nor body shaming. This person used the phrase “chubby” herself. I personally found her to be gorgeous. I never even noticed anything beyond what I can shoot with her. I don’t box people into anything based on some made-up societal stereotype. But I’m gonna do a meet-up regardless. In large part, a meet-up is to set expectations, discuss copyright, image use, take measurements (if applicable), go over looks and ideas and address concerns. But any concern of me making her look “chubby” never came up during that face to face. It came up in a text from her weeks later. It wasn’t brought up by me because I saw something in this alleged model that promised extraordinary. Something in her that screamed premium but had yet to be let loose and tapped into. I had some reservations but looks wasn’t one of them. My reservations were about personality and the very thing that has occurred. The complainer. The excuse maker. The person looking to find fault with a picture before a picture has even been taken; a self assigned fault that she herself has absolute and total control over.

You’ve seen me type “alleged” because a real model wouldn’t complain so much. A real model might be body conscious about her weight or height but she brings her confidence and her daring. Or he brings his talent and his looks. He or she knows how to pose and angle themselves in such a manner so as to de-emphasize those things they want de-emphasized. Furthermore, he or she would seek out collaborations willing to accommodate their self-proscribed flaws about themselves. Well, I’m not that guy. I shoot people that are ready and able to do what needs to be done. I work with people that are confident, bold and daring as they are beautiful. But what I won’t do is appeal to a person’s sense of self-loathing as an excuse for looks and posing they can’t do or don’t want to do. Modeling isn’t a field for the docile, the tame and the fearful. It’s brutal. It’s cut throat and it’s beautiful. A model is only as good as the next model who is more bold, more daring, more beautiful and more fearless. It’s that simple. I don’t care for complainers. I don’t get to complain when my lighting doesn’t work. I have to look for ways to solve it. I can’t say oh it’s raining so no need on shooting indoors either. That’s a waste. I don’t have excuses so I don’t allow them from anyone else.

If you don’t want high fashion looks then don’t pursue collaborations that do high fashion without doing what needs to be done for such looks. If you don’t want Guess style looks then you probably shouldn’t work with a photographer that loves those looks and want to such looks with you if you think you’re “Chubby” and then stress, moan, nag and complain that you don’t want to look chubby. Get over yourself. You’re not a model. You’re a fake. I need to move on to people who KNOW they’re models. 

One of the things I stress in this particular meet-up is that fact that the model had to trust the process. She has to trust the styling that has been selected. But no one has to do anything they don’t want to do so as long as it’s made clear at that meet-up or shortly thereafter. You get to change your mind. You get to say, I was caught up in the moment but on further thought, I don’t feel comfortable doing that look because I feel chubby. You get to cancel and never call me up again. That’s everyone’s right. Unless we have a contract signed prior to a shoot, you get to back out and I’m hoping beyond hope that she says she can’t do it. I can’t cancel. It’s just not my thing. Once committed I stay committed even if I don’t like a situation because that’s what professionals do. But I hope this model cancels if she doesn’t feel comfortable. I hope she messages and says I appreciate your time but I need to feel more confident in myself before I’m ready to shoot with you. Maybe she thinks she needs to lose weight. I don’t know and I can’t speak for her. I wish she would say she wants to take more time to be sure she’s ready. 

Don’t ever say you’re ready when you're not. Don’t pretend to be a attuned to what we are looking for when you’re not. Some people aren’t ready for Helios and there is no shame in that. Cancel your shoot before these weeks we have left turn into days or days into hours when my niceties turn into vehement disgust. Cancel your shoot and come back when you’re absolutely ready - when you can at least fake being bold. Any less than ABSOLUTE confidence shakes my own confidence in a person. I don’t want to spend hours post processing, or dollars in gas going from one location to another hauling equipment because you’re gonna think you’re chubby later no matter how much effort I take in this prospective collaboration.

But if you must continue, speak nothing ill of yourself in my presence. I need you to know you’re beautiful. Don’t just think it. I need to see yourself as I do. I see possibilities. I see stunning and breathtaking. I see windswept hair when I see you. I see backlit sunlight glistening against raven colored hair. I see endless creative depth. I see you in slow motion wearing red against a ocean colored sky. I see you lying in a pond suspended on lilies. I see your face with scarlet lips surrounded by white orchids. I need you to believe beyond a doubt you’re amazing. I need to YOU TO KNOW that you are Helios material. Do what must be done. Ask for tips. Look for ways to resolve the problems rather than complain about issues that have yet and may not ever manifest themselves. 

Worried about a less than narrow waist then get  a girdle and practice poses until it’s a non-issue. Worried about your hair color then seek a person willing to touch up your hair in line with the look(s). Not sure your hair is thick enough then look for extensions and request to have them added or ask if you should have them put in. 

Otherwise, take some time and get your head in order and build some confidence. It’s okay to put this off right now; tomorrow not so much - the next day less so and so on.